Hide and Seek January 13, 2008
Posted by jak in Creative Writing, Life, love, Poem, Poetry, Writing.trackback
Wooden planks of dust
Lean on floors of rust
Blanketing the ground
Nighttime bustle
Nighttime hustle
Until the child’s found
Tears dry to the taste
On a virgin face
Drip without a sound
A heavy home
A frozen womb
The cold keeps her now
She fled simple folly
This cold still Molly
A blanket for the ground
Nighttime bustle
Nighttime hustle
Until the child’s found
© 2007 Argonaut
A very interesting read, Jason. For some reason reading this makes me think of that poor little kidnapped British girl whose parents are now quasi-suspects. For me, the poem has an ominous air to it, sadness, agitation, and false hope. Of course, all this can also be a reflection of my own state of mind. :( I think your rhymes and word choice are very good. The 2S repetition at the end also hints of it being sung; as in an old folk song. It’s very well-written, and the images are clear and vivid to me.
Am I even close in my interpretation, Jason?
Of course. It was intended to be sad and ominous. I had hoped that it came across a little lyrically.