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give the beachsand one last kiss for me September 30, 2007

Posted by Jason Keath in Creative Writing, Life, Poem, Poetry, Writing.

These damp days just won’t dry out.
Rolling over me,
Cold gripping grains of history
Grind slowly against my side,
Rising with the tide,
Deep ridges become shallow,
Footprints form and wane,
Each sharp edge of my defense,
Slow motion crushing
From corner into curve.

First, each day creates you,
Deep beneath a rolling sea.
Protected by layers,
By parents and prayers.
Second, each day berates you,
Erasing tiny pieces.
Soft reality.
Time wears on us, determined,
Not to break us,
More to…
Blending hard edges,
Into gentler forms.

© 2007 Argonaut


1. Michelle Johnson - September 30, 2007

You never cease to amaze me with your writing. I really like this one because everyone has rough edges that need smoothing out from time to time. Keep up the good work.


2. meatish - October 1, 2007

cool stuff. i read it twice if that means anything.

3. Ruinn - October 1, 2007

Beautifully done, as always, Jak.


4. janetleigh - October 1, 2007

I love the contrast here between rough and smooth edges; a quality most personalities display. It appeals to me as a whole because I love the sea, sand, and.. and sharp objects, heh. And what I glean as a little playfulness at the end where you hesitate between the 2 lines,

“More to…

..well, it’s how I read it :) and these 2 lines are divine:

“Protected by layers,
By parents and prayers.”

Love it! *clap, clap*

5. qazse - October 2, 2007

great images, analogies, rhymes… sticks with me

6. justmemarissa - October 6, 2007

Beautiful thoughts…beautifully written. Time…life…and the wearing away of past pain…the creation of a person like the smooth rocks on the beach. Lovely…:)

7. KC - October 17, 2007

What a pregnant poem. So voluptuous with imagery. We are like sharp fragments of glass made smooth by the pounding sea…beautiful metaphor. Wonderfully written poem. Kudos!

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